Top 10 Reasons It’s A Good Thing The Skin’s Season Is Over
#10 The Redskins now have zero guys on IR.
#9 No need to worry about spending extra $$ on playoff tickets.
#8 For at least the next 8 months we no longer have to watch Antwaan Randle El return punts…or play football in any capacity for that matter.
#7 Albert Haynesworth can now get down on one knee and catch his breath…without getting carted off the field or causing an unscheduled TV time-out.
#6 We get to start tracking the flight patterns of Redskin’s One! Where in the world is the Danny and who’s he overpaying now?
#5 We can look forward to the NFL draft in April…where the Skins could do something really crazy…like draft an O-lineman!
#4 We can now concentrate our time on the Wizards playoff run…or Gilbert’s legal defense.
#3 Carlos Rogers is a free agent! 6 INT’s in 5 years. How many dropped INT’s…A LOT!
#2 The Redskins offensive game plans will no longer be devised in a meeting where the head coach devising the game plan is not allowed to actually call any offensive plays but the guy who is in charge of calling plays isn’t allowed in the meeting to build the game plan. Confusing? Yes.
#1 It’s the start of the offseason…the time of the year when the Redskins shine. Needing a head coach and with an uncapped year…we’re going to win the offseason again!
Cheers and Hail
Dallas Week: 15 Most Hated Cowboys
It’s Dallas Week, and no matter what the records are, no matter who’s name is on the back of the jersey’s…it means everything. The greatest rivalry in sports will play out on Jerry’s Disneyland field this Sunday. A lot of players have worn the star on their helmets and it was quite hard to widdle this list down to the 15 players that I have deemed my “most hated.” I’m sure I’ve left a few out…tell me about your most hated Cowgirls in the comments. And here’s a Skins/Boys YouTube to get you in the mood (you’ve seen them a hundred times…but they get better each time!)
#15 Tank Johnson
If there had been a metal detector at FedEx Field this guy would have never made it on the field….furthermore he acted like he won the Superbowl every time he tackled a running back after a 5 yard gain.
T#14 Alvin Harper
Mr. I catch 40 yard bombs for the Cowboys left and right and then I sign with the Redskins and catch 1 ball for 12 yards.
T#14 James Washington
Another Norv Turner signing of an ex-Cowboy player to the Redskins. Nicknamed “Drive by” for his big hits in Dallas…he drove by RFK the one year he was supposed to be playing for the Skins.
#13 Rocket Ismail
The only redemption I get from his 80 yard TD in overtime to beat the Skins in 99 is that he is now broke and squandered away million$.
#12 Mark Stepnowski
Probably the reason Aikman is gay. Aikman spent 10 years with his hands between the legs of his pot smoking, hair down to the middle of his back center.
#11 Leon Lett
#10 Erik Williams
This guy was such an A-hole that Michael Irvin should have stabbed him.
#9 Billy Davis
A part time player who never really hurt the Skins, I will always hate this guy for making me lose a bet many years ago when he dropped a TD in the end zone which would have given me the cover. I will never forget you Billy Davis.
#8 Butch Johnson
The “California Quake.” Enough said.
#7 Keyshawn Johnson
You can find his Wikipedia profile by searching for “bitching “ or “moaning.”
#6 Ken Norton
Ken Norton Sr. was once knocked out by Gerry Clooney in the first round. Ken Jr. celebrated this feat by annoyingly fighting the goalpost after a big play.
#5 Danny White
Who the F QB’s and punts the football…well Joe T. did once. How annoying is that? Thankfully Dexter put an end to that entire BS!
#4 Bill Bates
The Cowboys answer to Brian Mitchell, you know…the guy who after every play gave the opposing team an extra shove and some extra shit talking to boot. You love them when they play for your team, when they play for the Cowboys…
#3 Terrell Owens
Do I even need to validate this with words?
#2 Michael Irvin
This is a guy I still loathe, long after his career is over. He is the very definition of offensive pass interference…he stabbed his own teammate with a pair of scissors!
#1 Deion Sanders
After annoying me in nearly every way I thought possible for 5 seasons in Dallas…Deion did himself one better and stole millions from the Redskins for 1 season in 2000, doing his best Carlos Rodgers imitation.
Cheers and Hail
Fatpickled: Ten Post From Year 1
Here’s the final celebration of Fatpickled turning 1 last week…a list of 10 posts I think you should read. I can’t really call them a best of, or a top 10 list, because they would need to be award winning pieces or something for that. Nope, not winning any awards here at Fatpickled, just trying to entertain some of the people, some of the time. If you’ve been with me since the beginning, here’s a chance to relieve some old memories. If your new to the site, here’s a chance to catch up on some older posts. Whatever category you fit in, thanks for following Fatpickled.
Guys Night Out
This was a post about all the athletes I want to hang out with and have a beer. It was the most visited post I’ve ever done.
The Caddyshack Remake…Starring???
Over 3500 unique votes were cast to decide who should star in the Caddyshack remake.
The his and hers diary of a Redskins fan coping with a loss.
Hot Chicks
Coverage of the Sweet 16 Hot Chicks tournament won by Julianne Hough.
I Don’t Like The Yankees So Much
Probably the true winner of the most visited post ever, but we’ll never know as all the Yankees fans crashed the site for 8 days.
Guest bloggers and I discussed why we love the Redskins/Cowboys.
I match up athletes with their celebrity look alikes.
Exactly what it says, interviews I’ve done over the past year with various athletes.
Before the blog became sports only, I sometimes wrote about family stuff. This is a long, but funny read.
The first post ever, without this one there would be no others.
Cheers and Hail
Posted by fatpickle Date: Thursday, October 8, 2009
Categories: Fatpickled, Happy Birthday!
Tags: fatpickle, happy bday, top 10
Top 10 Reasons I’m Old
Today is my birthday, I’m 35. And despite my best efforts to rewind it back to age 24 a few years ago, the fact of the matter is…I’m old. WTF happened? Here is the Top 10 reasons I know I’m old:
#10. When I walk into a Hollister or Abercrombie, all the employees wonder who’s Dad just walked in.
#9 I remember buying Motley Crue and Poison’s first albums (cassette tapes.) Now they are considered classic rock.
#8. I’m in the worst shape of my life, by far. And my liver….well it’s just pissed at me.
#7. My favorite shows are no longer on TV, even in syndication.
#6. My Ipod playlist titled “New Stuff” is a collection of late 90′s and early 00′s songs.
#5. I’m older than every Redskins player except for 3. (the red snapper, Todd Collins, and Phillip Daniels, who shares by B-day!) I’m older than a couple of their coaches!
#4. I say things like “when I was growing up,” or “it seems like yesterday,” or “that was 10 years ago?”
#3. When my parents and uncles were 35, I thought they looked ancient. Now I think they look pretty damn good.
#2. In order to see my favorite bands in concert, they have to be on a reunion tour.
#1. I still have Suzanne Somers in my spank bank.
Cheers and Hail
Posted by fatpickle Date: Wednesday, March 4, 2009
Categories: Fatpickled, Happy Birthday!
Tags: birthday, fatpickle, top 10
Top 10 Interview Meltdowns
I love a classic head coaches post game interview meltdown. Both Singletary and Zorn has some minor flare-ups this weekend, and it got me thinking. What is the greatest interview meltdown ever? Well first off, what constitutes a meltdown? Usually it takes a poor performance by the coaches team, a pissed off coach, a stupid question by a reporter, and a few F-bombs. So, I have compiled my top 10 meltdowns. This is a coaches only category, no athletes, Gm’s, or owners.
Warning - some of the links contain angry middle-aged men dropping f-bombs, it’s funny stuff but turn your speakers down if your at work!
#10 Kevin Borseth - He addressed the media after addressing the Michigan Women’s B-ball team. I was scared watching him in the interview, I can’t imagine how the girls felt.
#9 Bob Knight - He has given us so much material it’s impossible to pick just one. Here he is explaining his favorite word.
#8 Mike Gundy - His intentions start out good, trying to defend one of his players. Somewhere in the interview he turned into Gny. Sgt. Hartman.
#7 Dennis Green - Maybe it’s wrong, but every time I watch this I think of Gary Coleman getting angry.
#6 Tommy Lasorda - Another guy who can fill up an hour of your time on youtube. The word that got Crash Davis thrown out of the game in Bull Durham is very prevalent here.
#5 Earl Weaver - My favorite manager of all time. Whether this was scripted, a practical joke, or real, it’s funny. Alice Sweet where are you?
#4 John Chaney - This one features Chaney going into another coaches interview and threatens to kill him. We’re covering new ground here.
#3 Jim Mora - From the man that brought you “diddly poo”. One of the most imitated interviews “playoffs?”. Do you like random triangles on your shirts?
#2 Hal Mcrae - Once again we are breaking new ground here, drawing blood. Check out Hal in his long johns and the reporter walking out of the office with blood dripping from his cheek. “Now put that in your pipe and smoke it”.
#1 Lee Elia - The mother of all breakdowns. He doesn’t bitch about the media or the team, but the fans! Less than a month into the season he delivered this doozy. It was so good he was invited back to Chicago last year for a reunion. “85% of the world is working, the other 15% come out here”.
Cheers and Hail
Posted by fatpickle Date: Tuesday, October 28, 2008
Categories: Fatpickled, NFL
Tags: earl weaver, head coaches, meltdowns, top 10, zorn
